No, I never said that, as far as you know. #
I'm not worried. Sooner or later I'll find a girl that finds ineptitude and paralyzing insecurity downright charming. #
LGFW, Day 4: Romona Keveza. Pretty.
#LGFW
http://yfrog.com/e4nsehj #
Free candy is the greatest thing to happen since the advent of candy. Or free… whichever happened most recently. #FreeCandyIsSweet! #
Rubber pants: pro or con? Let's say I'm asking for a friend. #
Rachel Mara, LGFW, DAY 3… Pretty.
http://twitpic.com/2zfkg0 #
Pancakes need to be wrapped around more things.
Er, food-related things. Like waffles. Man, I could go for some panffles right now… #
Sharing photos of your cat dressed up in her new wig is not the way to land a husband. #
I live every week like it's shark week. #
"Mature for your age"
Is not the same as "mature". #
"Mature for your age"
Is not the same as "mature". #
When did we get so many varieties of band-aids? I shouldn't have to choose between 'prevents infection' and 'promotes healing'. #
I wish you could freebase coffee. #
Thanks for tattling about sentences ending with prepositions. This is precisely the sort of thing up with which I will not put. #
Man's explored other worlds using less technology than what's in my smartphone, but I can't I buy a bag of M&Ms that are all blue? #WTF #
You know how italics are all slanty? I'm like that all the time. #
Today I learned that my 'clicks be kickin'.
And that clicks means shoes and kicking is good. Thanks, pleasant random urban youth! #
I need to start a rent-a-mom service.
Or at least hire one of those special-ed ladies to follow me around.
I'm huuuuuungry. #
Also, without access to a mom (or grocery store where I can project a helpless baby bird vibe until a nice lady helps) how do I get dinner? #
Without access to a mom, how does [...]
Gym guy to pretty girl: I can dead lift 500 lbs. Me: I can't. But we could shop and share our feelings maybe? Who'd you rather? Check. Mate. #
Ugh. That man is the human equivalent of finding a pubic hair on a bar of soap. #
Far too few products are available in jerky-form. #
Fact: The number of beautiful women I will run into whilst running errands is directly related to how unkempt I look. #
Seniority is a corporation's way of deterring youthful ambition. #
The liver is evil and needs to be punished. Cheers! #
It's so hot, I'm pretty sure Environment Canada just declared my swamp ass a protected wetland. #
Happy Birthday America! You guys are alright, so we talked to Mexico and decided you can keep riding bitch on our continent. [hugs!] #
The Swedish people have too strong a foothold in the gummy market. #